3 Simple Steps to Having the Wedding of Your Dreams
If you clicked this article knowing that the title is based on a false premise, good for you. You are one step closer to the wedding of your dreams. Below are a few simple steps for a wonderful wedding experience.
Step 1 – Perspective
Begin your planning with a goal. Consider having a goal that reaches beyond the wedding day. Ask yourself a couple of simple questions that you most likely have already considered. What kind of marriage do I want? What kind of life do I want? I know, these are pretty deep questions for wedding planning but this will allow you to put your planning in the proper perspective. Plan your day, your events, your schedule, based upon these larger goals.
For example, if your larger goal is to commit to your spouse the rest of your life, try and implement some elements in your day that represent that goal. If family and friends are the most important thing in your life, make sure to think about your day in a way that maximizes the time and energy committed to them.
This very quietly has some extremely powerful effects.
1.) As you float through your day, you will be greeted with constant reminders of the things that are important to you. This sense of purpose and gratitude makes for a powerful cocktail.
2.) This subtlety re-directs the energy of the day from a stance of, “What is making ME happy” to “How can I celebrate my spouse, and enjoy my family and friends”
The proper perspective sets the stage for a successful day… and even better… a successful marriage.
Step 2 – Pick the Right Vendors
Thank you Captian Obvious… but wait, there is more to this. Let’s examine our criteria for selecting vendors for a moment. Selecting the right vendors involves more than booking “the best” vendor or venue you can afford.
For instance, if your dream wedding venue is getting married on a rock formation in the Galapagos Islands you can expect a good portion of your friends and family will not be able to attend your big day. If your goal is to celebrate with friends and family, that venue (which may be fantastic) may not be the “RIGHT” venue. That is why goals are important! They provide clarity!
An important criteria to consider is vendor personality and disposition. You want vendors that have a default setting of making your day and your life better. You want to work with people who are helpful and show that they care. You want vendors that have a greater goal as well. Most of the best vendors I have met really want your overall day to be as wonderful as possible, and not just their product or service. This creates a team environment where vendors all come together to serve the client — It’s magical when it comes together — I recall working with DJs that help clean reception tables, limo drivers that mend bridesmaid dresses, and photographers (not naming any names…ha) that cry with a mother of the bride as she flips through old photos of her parents wedding album.
These are the vendors you want to work with and celebrate with. Their commitment to your day often goes beyond what is outlined in their contract. They have a calling a bit beyond the service they provide.
Also, see our related article: How to Choose a Wedding Photographer
Step 3 – Work Together
Wedding planning is a “team-lift” activity, don’t try to take it on by yourself. This is something Brittany and I would re-visit if we could go back in time. I think I was fired within about the first 10 minutes of wedding planning and relegated to plan the honeymoon. If I am being honest, this was a relief to me, so I happily checked out of the process.
Don’t be me.
The wedding and wedding planning process is great marriage practice. Consider this — Wedding planning requires sitting down, communicating about the wants and needs of your spouse to-be, requires involving family members on each side, forces each person to compromise on things that are important to them, and involves working within a budget to accomplish all of the above. Do any of these things sound familiar? I have been married for a decade now and that sounds like almost every day of my marriage.
If your tendency is to be passive in the process (like I was) I encourage you to get more involved. Learn about what is required and pitch in. Two people with unified goals can accomplish a lot and it creates a really powerful bond in the process.
Don’t miss out on this opportunity to build something together.
The perfect wedding doesn’t come from perfect execution. It comes from persevering through the imperfections to achieve a greater goal. Interestingly enough, this concept closely resembles a concept we often call: Love.